Cerabino: School’s out, video games in, for solar eclipse


Palm Beach County’s public schools are allowing students to stay home on Monday so they can safely observe the afternoon’s partial solar eclipse for as long as their parents allow.

Students who choose to go to school may only view the eclipse during principal-authorized viewing events with glasses approved by the American Astronomical Society in sessions that last no longer than three minutes.

I suspect that many of the students who will be skipping school on Monday have no interest in the eclipse, but are simply looking to turn this rare celestial event into an extra day of leisure.

So how do you as a parent write that excuse note to the school?

Don’t worry. As a full-service newspaper columnist, I’ve got you covered. No matter what the devotion level your child has to celestial happenings, I’ve written you a one-size-fits-all note that you can use to explain the absence of your little (astronomerslacker).

Just pick the best words in italics that fit your situation.

***

Dear School Principal:

This is a note to explain why my son missed school Monday.

From an early age, he has exhibited an uncanny fascination with the workings of the ( solar / video-gaming ) system.

I’ve lost track of the number of hours he has spent spent gazing at the ( stars in the skyscreen in his room ), as he devotes himself to the (wW)orld of ( astronomyWarcraft ) and the ( mathematical nuances / cheat codes ) that unlock its secrets.

There are times I will come home from work and ask what he has done that day, and he will say excitedly, “I ( charted a near-Earth asteroid.”leveled up to a paladin.”)

Yes, he’s a committed learner. So naturally, he was very excited about Monday’s solar eclipse and has been making preparations to get the most out of it. Just the other day, he went to the ( library / WaWa ) and got himself a pair of ( sunglasses / Mountain Dews) for the big day.

He saw this as a rare opportunity to ( observe a partial eclipse of the sunlead a raid against the Nighthold dungeon.)

It’s something he will be talking about to ( hisscience teacherthe other member of the Horde) for quite some time.

I can assure you that as ( the eclipse became visiblehe woke up for the day ) on Monday afternoon at 1:30, he immediately had his (special glassesgame controller ) on his ( face / lap ) and was ready to make his observations as a ( journal entrytrash-talking blood elf).

In the event that you would require documentation to how he spent his day off, I have attached to this note ( a copy of his journalan empty bag of Funyons).

As a parent, I appreciate the district giving students the ability to get to another level in their ( educationgame ) by allowing them the ( real fantasy ) life chance to engage in independent ( studyr0le play ).

It is through opportunities like this that students learn to maximize their time fighting against ( low expectationsthe Burning Legion ) and ( limited opportunitiesthe undead Scourge).

Chances like this shouldn’t be missed. So thank you.

Writing this letter has made me realize that the next time I might have a chance to write a similar note will be in seven years, the year the next solar eclipse is visible in North America.

And by then, who knows? My young scholar may very well be ( in collegea Mage).



Reader Comments ...


Next Up in Local

John Legend blames Trump for government shutdown, calls him racist
John Legend blames Trump for government shutdown, calls him racist

Grammy and Oscar-winning singer John Legend is claiming that President Donald Trump and his team’s alleged racism are behind the government shutdown. Legend, who has vocally criticized Trump Sr. and Jr. both in the past, tweeted the following just after midnight Saturday: “The reason the government shutdown is that Trump...
Three fun things happening in Lake Worth
Three fun things happening in Lake Worth

1. Art Meets Jazz on J Street Exhibition in Gallery, through Feb. 6, Clay Glass Metal Stone Gallery, 15 South J Street.Check out Jazz on J Street inspired photography, sketch art, fine and mixed media artwork. 2. Paint Your Wagon, Lake Worth Playhouse, 713, Lake Avenue. In California in May 1853, Ben Rumson strikes gold and establishes...
Hop on over to Lake Worth Beach’s Bonfire on Friday
Hop on over to Lake Worth Beach’s Bonfire on Friday

The Lake Worth Beach Bonfire started in 1997 as a low-key event, attended mostly by locals. The event has certainly changed over the years. “Now it has grown in not only size, but popularity,” said Lauren Bennett, Lake Worth’s Assistant Leisure Services Director. “Not only are we the only beach in the county that hosts bonfires...
Lake Worth nixes woman’s plan to turn property into hotel, music, bar
Lake Worth nixes woman’s plan to turn property into hotel, music, bar

Mary Sisoian went before Lake Worth’s City Commission this past week with a request. She wanted to rezone her site at 18 S. Palmway Drive, property records show she bought for $525,000 in 2005, from medium density multi-family residential to downtown. On Oct. 4, the city’s Planning and Zoning Board approved Sisoian running a bed and breakfast...
JUST IN: 12-year-old boy shot in Boynton Beach
JUST IN: 12-year-old boy shot in Boynton Beach

Boynton Beach Police are investigating after a 12-year-old boy was injured in a shooting at the 1000 block of Northwest Fourth Street. Witnesses told authorities that a gold or tan SUV pulled to the front of the Cherry Hill Mini Market around 2:45 p.m. Three men exited the car and allegedly started shooting at unknown men standing in the area...
More Stories